Looking forward to something.

I've always loved looking forward to something.  I still do.  Always.  For anything good, pleasant, desirable.

I love the idea of having different things happening all at the same time so I don't need to have a break.  I can go from doing one thing and straight on to another.

After my day is done, I'd like to know that there is food that I'm willing to go back home for to prepare. Or that there is money available to buy food, cooked or uncooked.  Or that there is something waiting for me.  Or someone somewhere to meet up and hang out.  Or that there are friends who are up to something that I could be a part of.  After all the activities of the day are done, I'd like to have sleep come at me and knock me down at the instant that I want it to.

When it comes to having a meal in front of me, I like to have a variety of food types on my plate.  While I'm eating rice, there should be meat to look forward to.  With the meat I'd like some veges on the side.  Some colored greens.  There should be some tasty looking protein-labeled ration to give the food a side flavor to remember after meal time has passed.  Soup that's thick and ready to be savored would be much appreciated if there's an opportunity for it.  Salad gives a meal it's nutritiously-healthy air.  Whether it'd be vegetable or fruit salad.  Add it to my cuisine please.  Dessert is not mandatory, but always appreciated.  Just a little would do.  Now for the drink.  My, oh my.  For the love of money, drinks can't be left out, don't you dare leave it out.  From thick orange or apple juice to a banana smoothie to those sparkling glasses of cocktail making me swoon.  I'd fancy myself to some wine if you don't mind.  Now I'm getting carried away with food variety of my fantasies.

It's not only food that I like to look forward too.  I like to look forward to exam results when I'm anticipating great ones of course.  I look forward to moving.  To new places.  New feelings.  New plans.  New and fresh promises.  New love.  Oh.  Here we go.  New Love.  Sounds fascinating and pleasant already just by the mention of it.

I guess I don't give up then.  I don't back down just cos something or someone pushes me into a dark corner and suppresses me for a period of time.  I always get up again.  I always set something up again.  Something to look forward to again.

To be frank, things have been tough.  Reality has molded, shaped, bent and broken me.  It has played me over and over.  I have had to let go of a lot of things and people.  I have also had to just accept things (and people) for the way they are.  But I always come out of them.  I've always learned to learn from them.  I've always picked myself up and had kept moving.

Looking forward to something has always been a good feeling to be transfixed in.  In that particular moment, you know, you are happy, you smile and you savor joyously a perfect moment that even though would pass anyway, at that moment, it was truly yours.

Looking forward to something good.  Or just merely looking forward.  That in itself is already good enough.

Love, Ny.